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Dear Fran

August 1, 2010

Dear Fran,

I read your post “Men are from Mars etc” and I just concluded that you probably know a lot about men and about relationships. So here I am, asking for your input regarding a certain problem that I am having. If you decide to publish my letter as a post, please remove all personal info about me first.
So I’m a 21 year old woman, currently going to school, working part time to help pay tuition. I’m seeing a man, he’s 24 and currently unemployed.
We hang out all the time, he’s always coming by my apartment to sleepover and we watch movies on my couch together and stuff like that. I’ve been seeing him for about six or seven months and I’m ready to fully commit. The problem is, I don’t think he’s ready, because if he was, he would have asked right? Why hasn’t he asked?
What do you think I should do?

Dear Reader,
I was really flattered and surprised when I got your email. I think it’s really cool that you think that I should start doing an advice column on my blog. It’s a great idea, but I’m a seventeen year old girl and I’m very inexperienced in a lot of areas. But I’ll still do the best I can.
A few things in your letter really concerned me:
First of all, if he’s unemployed. Does that mean that you have to be paying for things often? It’s probably hard enough on you, since tuition is so expensive and you’re receiving very little help with that.
Secondly, I noticed that when you guys hang out, it’s always at your apartment, never at a restaurant, movie or party. I don’t really know your situation, so I don’t want to judge. Please ask yourself why you and this man are never seen in public together.
Thirdly, his friends and family don’t know that you exist. This is a big problem to me. Again, ask yourself why he hasn’t introduced you to any of his friends, or even his family.
I honestly think that if he wanted a relationship, he would have brought it up in conversation at least once. If he’s not bringing it up, I think you should.
Hope I helped.

– Fran.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. August 1, 2010 2:26 pm

    Firstly he’s 24yrs old unemployed by reading the letter it sounds as tho he isnt trying to get one either. My question is are u willing to pay all bills and pay ur tuition at the same time, is he educated, does he plan to get a job, wat r his short/long term goals, can he maintain u if u should get pregnant. Has he ever introduced u to his family. How does he treat women in general. My advice to u is get ur education before thinking about getting involved in a relationship. A man who is in love with a woman is not afraid to tell to world of her.

  2. August 1, 2010 7:24 pm

    ok ur welcome just dont rush anything

  3. August 1, 2010 11:32 pm

    I dont mean to sound all motherly but I’m so proud of you Franny! Your blog which was once a figment of imagination, something you just talked about doing, is really coming to life.

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